I met David Wain once and he asked me if my name was Jill. It's not.

 

"Yeah, Pierre, I’ll pose for you in a sec. Let me just tweet this right quick."

"Yeah, Pierre, I’ll pose for you in a sec. Let me just tweet this right quick."

If I said I find you attractive, could I call you a Court-eney of appeals?

oh okay

Today in “more commercials that bother me!” The card swipes in this commercial are with the card facing the wrong direction. I get why you do it, American Express, but it bothers me as someone who works retail and also has this same American Express card. At least edit out the awful washboard sound of THE EMBOSSED CREDIT CARD NUMBERS GOING THROUGH THE CARD READER. Nice 30 Rock callbacks to the jaw acne, body pillow, and chips or potpourri? dilemma, though.

My reaction to most April Fools Day jokes

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING M—oh okay yes of course you are."

This commercial is clearly promoting laxative abuse, right? As in, like, having an eating disorder? I can’t be the only one seeing this. Are people talking about this? They must be.

The worst thing about working in the pharmacy

is that people feel comfortable answering honestly when you ask them how they are. No. No, I was just looking for a “fine, thanks.”

perpetualweirdo:

moonsmilk:

brandongeurts:

Detail from To Lose Oneself. 
2014. Watercolor, ink wash, and pen on paper.

One of my entries in an art show about vaginas.
This is probably the least SFW piece I’ve ever done.

Homeboy killin it

perpetualweirdo:

moonsmilk:

brandongeurts:

Detail from To Lose Oneself. 

2014. Watercolor, ink wash, and pen on paper.

One of my entries in an art show about vaginas.

This is probably the least SFW piece I’ve ever done.

Homeboy killin it

Here’s my problem with Facebook:

I feel like I can never be too weird to someone who added ME. It’s like, THIS IS IT. THIS IS ME. THIS IS WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR. HOPE YOU’RE READY FOR THIS.

Last year was my fifth year with Publix. Next week is the anniversary luncheon for associates celebrating their 5, 10, 15 (and so on) anniversaries. Like any other anniversary, I’ve been asked to prepare a statement verifying that I do indeed love my girlfriend thisssss much.

Last year was my fifth year with Publix. Next week is the anniversary luncheon for associates celebrating their 5, 10, 15 (and so on) anniversaries. Like any other anniversary, I’ve been asked to prepare a statement verifying that I do indeed love my girlfriend thisssss much.